Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

I like making subliminal messages (givemeyourmoney)

I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.