Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

I wonder why people were happy after the last election

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

Try tosing in the same tone and impersonate a girl voice while listening to music in my room, but then quickly start humming in a low voice when someones walking by -Ethan

Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

Having gay sex

When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

When a teacher at school leaves a line of pen on the big whiteboard, my attention can NOT be drawn from it.

I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

Every time I see people's bare feet I'm automatically counting their toes to make sure if they have an extra toe or two.

I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.