If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

thumb_up thumb_down -49

When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

I got 12 months free xbox live gold from this website http://freexboxlivegoldcodes.org .You can also get it.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

pretend your on the phone talking to someone to make you look like you not a loner

thumb_up thumb_down -53

When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

thumb_up thumb_down -57

I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

thumb_up thumb_down -59

try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Just think about this. I do. What if we are all a character from The Sims and there is someone controlling us as their character and we never really did anything by our own choice. Creepy.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I never feel bored

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Solving your problems in bed before sleeping and then forgetting all of the solutions when you wake up. This applies to games, homework, and world hunger.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Put a few bits of toilet paper in the toilet before having a poo so there is no splash!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

thumb_up thumb_down -40

When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

thumb_up thumb_down -56

When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

thumb_up thumb_down -78

Take off the ends of the banana (

thumb_up thumb_down -100

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.