Pretend i'm a sim.

on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

Look at my poo before I flush it.

When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

Take off the ends of the banana (

Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

when I go shopping I go in the store, get what I need and then I leave I don't browse.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.