Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

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When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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Comment on here and wait a few days and see if I got some likes . CMOOON , You do it .

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Before getting in the shower, staring at your naked body, thinking your sexy.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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Try tosing in the same tone and impersonate a girl voice while listening to music in my room, but then quickly start humming in a low voice when someones walking by -Ethan

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fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

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Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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I'm a female. Sometimes I pee in the shower just so that I can try to aim my pee at the drain. This way I can imagine what it's like to pee with a doodle.

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Tough but loving hands!! Mmm them calluses tho!! ^_^

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check shower for murder then pee

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.