Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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Having gay sex

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When I was younger I'd lay in bed & think about who I would pick if a person told me that I had to choose between 2 people and the 1 that I don't choose will die.

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I push the door open with my stomach

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

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I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

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I never feel bored

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

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When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.