Brake for tail-gaters

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.

Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

wen on this website go look at the most disliked

I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

I always walk down the hall James Bond style. Gun out, along the wall, looking around corners before I walk into or by a room.

look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.

I push the door open with my stomach

Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

I pee in the shower. :3

think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

Sometimes when I'm watching a sitcom, I get distracted from the jokes because the characters are in a bedroom and I start focusing on the awesome stuff they have.

Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.