Brake for tail-gaters

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.

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Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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wen on this website go look at the most disliked

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

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I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

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I always walk down the hall James Bond style. Gun out, along the wall, looking around corners before I walk into or by a room.

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look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.

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I push the door open with my stomach

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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I pee in the shower. :3

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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Sometimes when I'm watching a sitcom, I get distracted from the jokes because the characters are in a bedroom and I start focusing on the awesome stuff they have.

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Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.