I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

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Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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Just think about this. I do. What if we are all a character from The Sims and there is someone controlling us as their character and we never really did anything by our own choice. Creepy.

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humiliating little girls

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.