When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

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The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

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Sometimes when I'm watching a sitcom, I get distracted from the jokes because the characters are in a bedroom and I start focusing on the awesome stuff they have.

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

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Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

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Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

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I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.