I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

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When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

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Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

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I always feel as if someone is always watching me on a screen where ever I am, and every person in the world is also being watched as well

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Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.