Showering with my uncle Jarrett <3

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I have had a dream where my teeth fall out.

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

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.don't like something because being scared that it appears on my wall.

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Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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eat curry and don't complain about its spiciness ...if you're not white

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When I'm in the shower, I talk to myself, usually about my plans for video game procedures.

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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that time where you open the fridge door and stare at it for like 10 min then close it and walk away?

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if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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I mean Diana Ross.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.