when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

pee when you are dreaming haha lol

Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

thinking that everybody in the world (except me) has a device which shows them what i am doing, watching and makes them feel what i am feeling

Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.