I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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I like to record the audio from TV shows and movies onto cassette tapes from my stereo, and listen to them on my Walkman while I'm working in the kitchen or around the house.

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Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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Text random people saying I'm pregnant

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

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think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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Stepping on a concrete sidewalk square the exact amount of times as the others.

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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I have the idea that i'm the only one who looks at this site.

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When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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Play as both sides on fifa

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.