look at bins as i walk past them

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Brake for tail-gaters

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I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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Stepping on a concrete sidewalk square the exact amount of times as the others.

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I don't like just killing bugs in my home so what I do is I would catch them in a tissue and flush them down my toilet

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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I think about other women when having sex

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Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.