Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

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I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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Every time I see people's bare feet I'm automatically counting their toes to make sure if they have an extra toe or two.

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I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

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I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

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When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

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Brake for tail-gaters

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Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

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When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

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Before getting in the shower, staring at your naked body, thinking your sexy.

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Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

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Having gay sex

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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I have the idea that i'm the only one who looks at this site.

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Hang something small in front of the webcam, in case someone is secretly watching me.

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.