Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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I never feel bored

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

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Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

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I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.