sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

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Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

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when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

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Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

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When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

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Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.