sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

thumb_up thumb_down -33

when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

thumb_up thumb_down -105

after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

thumb_up thumb_down

When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

thumb_up thumb_down -6

When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

thumb_up thumb_down -8

sometimes when i'm talking to myself and someone walks in the room i have to make them believe what i'm saying is a song!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

pee when you are dreaming haha lol

thumb_up thumb_down -24

on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.