Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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get under the covers and curl up into a ball to get warm really fast

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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When peeing at a urinal, move my stream back and forth the coat as much of the wall as I can.

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When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

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Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

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Vote up your own websites posts, to make them look more popular!

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

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Turn shower water all the way up hot before getting out because it feels good

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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I got 12 months free xbox live gold from this website http://freexboxlivegoldcodes.org .You can also get it.

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.