Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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When I use the bathroom at school, I keep the door open with the kickstand and use the stall. It's because I fear that one day, when I'm all alone in the bathroom with the door closed, the fire alarm will go off and scare the living crap out of me. This trick backfires when someone comes in without closing the door and uses the urinal.

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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Look at my poop before flushing

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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Just think about this. I do. What if we are all a character from The Sims and there is someone controlling us as their character and we never really did anything by our own choice. Creepy.

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

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when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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use tweezers to pull out leg hair or armpit hair out of sheer boredom.

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.