I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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When you say bye to someone and keep walking in the same direction, and then its really awkward...

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Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

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I don't leave the toilet in a public restroom until the other person leaves, so I don't have to make awkward eye contact.

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I don't like just killing bugs in my home so what I do is I would catch them in a tissue and flush them down my toilet

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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Sometimes, I have a hard time looking people I know in the eyes but have no trouble looking strangers in the eyes. I wish I knew why. Help!

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When your alone in the house you walk around naked even though there is no point

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Play as both sides on fifa

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I look behind me and out of my window every 10 minutes while I'm sitting at my desk because I'm scared something's gonna be there.

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I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

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Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.