When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

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Look at my poop before flushing

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If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

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Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

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Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

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When in the shower dread putting the shower gel on you chest as it is freezing!!!

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

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After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

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When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

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Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.