Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

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When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

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~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

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I chew around the center of carrots.

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

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When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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I look behind me and out of my window every 10 minutes while I'm sitting at my desk because I'm scared something's gonna be there.

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When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

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I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.