I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

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While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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when i use omegle u usually say im a girl, when a guy says how long is his thing, i say 'mine too' :D

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fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

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I push the door open with my stomach

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

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I look behind me and out of my window every 10 minutes while I'm sitting at my desk because I'm scared something's gonna be there.

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I choose not to post a comment on some subjects because I know there will be a hundred others that will be the same.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

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When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

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Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.