Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

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If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

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Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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Brake for tail-gaters

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

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Think about breathing...

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

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I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

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I chew around the center of carrots.

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When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

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I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

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Being the only one laughing at something on TV, then feeling awkward.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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Stare off into space in the middle of a conversation

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When I see someone with similar hair to mine, I stare at them from behind and try to figure out if that's what I look like from the back.

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When at a red you watch the light real close and as soon as it turns green you try to beat the other cars to the other side of intersection

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.