When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

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When does eating pop corn, take apart the bag and lick all the extra butter.

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I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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I never feel bored

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Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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I look behind me and out of my window every 10 minutes while I'm sitting at my desk because I'm scared something's gonna be there.

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I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

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I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

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i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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look at bins as i walk past them

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.