When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

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when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

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When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

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When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

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Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

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Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

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I always feel as if someone is always watching me on a screen where ever I am, and every person in the world is also being watched as well

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When I was younger I'd lay in bed & think about who I would pick if a person told me that I had to choose between 2 people and the 1 that I don't choose will die.

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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sometimes when i'm talking to myself and someone walks in the room i have to make them believe what i'm saying is a song!!

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thinking that everybody in the world (except me) has a device which shows them what i am doing, watching and makes them feel what i am feeling

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.