When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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Smell a fart and don't react until someone else does.

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wish you looked like either Kellan Lutz or Bradley Cooper! I wish magic existed now.

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Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

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Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

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Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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When I wait for something to load, I right click and then quickly try to drag a box around the right click box before it disappears. Then I try to right click and drag and see if I can outline the right click box before it appears.

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When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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I chew around the center of carrots.

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Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

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You pretend to fight imaginary people while no ones looking:/ But you look like the star wars kid...

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.