pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

Try tosing in the same tone and impersonate a girl voice while listening to music in my room, but then quickly start humming in a low voice when someones walking by -Ethan

When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

I think about other women when having sex

I'm a female. Sometimes I pee in the shower just so that I can try to aim my pee at the drain. This way I can imagine what it's like to pee with a doodle.

Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

humiliating little girls

I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

look at bins as i walk past them

Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

k. everyone

when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.