When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

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i have conversations in my head about showing someone some music and end up playing specific parts of various songs on my ipod and memorise the timings just in case it does happen

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When I'm in a car and I hear a song on the radio, I always imagine myself performing it perfectly in front of a crowd even though I know I'd never be able to do that. I've done this since I was very young and still do.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

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Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

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when making thing only you think you do you never read the terms of service

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While in the "try on" rooms of a clothing store, check myself out in the massive, wall mirror that's in there... and/or get nervous that someone is watching me.

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Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

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I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.