Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

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When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

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I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

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I mean Diana Ross.

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after switching lights..i go run as hard as i could do after reaching the bed

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Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

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When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

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In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

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Sometimes I reflect on my life and just feel humiliated.

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the power to regenerate your appendix

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

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When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

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Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

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Hold your breath when you go in bridge tunnels and compete against your friends to see who can last longer.

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Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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you look at someone and they look toward you and you look away quickly then you look back to see if they are still looking.

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When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.