I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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spank it during my commute if I am in traffic

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

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I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

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Forget a seemingly simple word. Shout it out at random 3 days later...(don't tell me you don't do this)

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Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

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Thinking your life is a movie...

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I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

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Take off the ends of the banana (

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.