when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

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Eat the last bowl of ice cream. Then 6 hours later, you wish you hadn't. (sometimes even open the fridge and check whether you actually ate it or not)

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

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Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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Look at my poop before flushing

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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pee when you are dreaming haha lol

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Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.