when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

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WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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if something stands for something, i come up with my own version of it.

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imagine killing someone by accident and feeling really guilty about it.

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While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

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I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

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I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

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I push the door open with my stomach

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

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When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.