on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

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Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

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Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

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when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

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I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

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Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Have arguments with yourself about what to wear, where you put that other shoe, whether to get out of bed, etc. Just get up! No, you do it! You're the one who set the alarm! Ughhhhh I hate you!!

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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use tweezers to pull out leg hair or armpit hair out of sheer boredom.

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.