Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

Feels my beard with my tongue.

when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

Look at my poo before I flush it.

recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

LOG OFF OF ICHAT BECAUSE THE PERSON U WERE JUST TALKING TO WENT OFFLINE.

I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.