when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

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Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

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Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

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Eating chicken at KFC.

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

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The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

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CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

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See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

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Poo really loud

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

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When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.