My parents are annoying.

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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Being the only one laughing at something on TV, then feeling awkward.

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When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

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When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

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Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

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I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

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my favorite singer is Bles Bridges 22/07/1947-24/03/2000

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I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

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When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

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Look at my poop before flushing

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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check shower for murder then pee

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when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

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Stare off into space in the middle of a conversation

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.