check shower for murder then pee

When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

the time where you sit behind a person that smells like BO badly!!!

Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

wen on this website go look at the most disliked

if something stands for something, i come up with my own version of it.

Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

I always think I have special powers

My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

I push the door open with my stomach

when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

I think about other women when having sex

When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

Hearing someone say something but saying "what" because you need more time to think of an answer

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.