check shower for murder then pee

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

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Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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the time where you sit behind a person that smells like BO badly!!!

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Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

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when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

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wen on this website go look at the most disliked

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if something stands for something, i come up with my own version of it.

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Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

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Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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I always think I have special powers

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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I push the door open with my stomach

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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I think about other women when having sex

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When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

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Hearing someone say something but saying "what" because you need more time to think of an answer

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.