- Things You Think Only You Do

Brake for tail-gaters

When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.

listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

if something stands for something, i come up with my own version of it.

I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

I wonder why people were happy after the last election

Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

Having gay sex

I push the door open with my stomach

when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

I have the idea that i'm the only one who looks at this site.

There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

look at bins as i walk past them

Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.