When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

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Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

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When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

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When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

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Stepping on a concrete sidewalk square the exact amount of times as the others.

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I have the idea that i'm the only one who looks at this site.

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Say "what?" when you know what they said, then answer before they can respond. I do it because it takes me a second to figure out what they said and so my immediate response it "what?".

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.