I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

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I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

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Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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I look at this site and wonder if the thumbs up are all from people who actually do the same thing, or just people who like that or think it's a funny thing to do.

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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i noticed that a lot of people pronounce "LOL" like roll. Am i the only one that reads it as L. O. L. (el oh el) ????

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realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

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Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

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thinking your pants are wet when you only just sat down for a long time

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Just think about this. I do. What if we are all a character from The Sims and there is someone controlling us as their character and we never really did anything by our own choice. Creepy.

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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When a teacher at school leaves a line of pen on the big whiteboard, my attention can NOT be drawn from it.

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when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

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Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

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Look at my poo before I flush it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.