I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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Text random people saying I'm pregnant

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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I always write b as d or d as b since I've learned the alphabet, and i hate my keyboarb cuz its on lower case every time.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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I think about other women when having sex

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

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When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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humiliating little girls

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Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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I make weird crazy faces at myself in the mirror whenever I leave the bathroom.

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.