Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

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as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

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listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

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I look at this site and wonder if the thumbs up are all from people who actually do the same thing, or just people who like that or think it's a funny thing to do.

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Put a few bits of toilet paper in the toilet before having a poo so there is no splash!

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Feeling self conscious about breathing to loudly

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humiliating little girls

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Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

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Zoning out while looking at something and then trying to find the spot you were looking at when you're out of the zone but you can't find it.

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Eating chicken at KFC.

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.