- Things You Think Only You Do

When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

Look at my poop before flushing

When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

Pretend animals talk to you!

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.