A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

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When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

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When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

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Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

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Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.