Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

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When reading something on the internet highlighting the words, they don't even have to be what you'r reading just highlighting large sections of the article at random.

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I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

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After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

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i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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Think about breathing...

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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My parents are annoying.

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Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

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Being the only one laughing at something on TV, then feeling awkward.

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spank it during my commute if I am in traffic

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I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

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When I use the bathroom at school, I keep the door open with the kickstand and use the stall. It's because I fear that one day, when I'm all alone in the bathroom with the door closed, the fire alarm will go off and scare the living crap out of me. This trick backfires when someone comes in without closing the door and uses the urinal.

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I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.