When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

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When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

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Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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Text random people saying I'm pregnant

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Being the only one laughing at something on TV, then feeling awkward.

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Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

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When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

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My bedroom is at the end of the house, so when I turn the light out and sprint to the lounge room, thinking Jeff the Killer could get me...

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

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I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.