k. everyone

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

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My parents are annoying.

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WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

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Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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Pretend to be texting to look popular in public

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

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When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

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Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

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when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

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get under the covers and curl up into a ball to get warm really fast

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.