Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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Rubbing the corners of your lips on the side of your hand and smelling it.

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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Brake for tail-gaters

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When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

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look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

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strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.