Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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I meow when my cat meows.

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

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make those little rectangles with your mouse on the computer get so close that they are together and you cant see them and try to move to the left or right, keeping the lines together so you cant see them.

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Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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I save my files as "askjaskjaks" because I'm too lazy to give them a proper name.

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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Search for blackheads on your arms for hours just because youre bored!

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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Think about breathing...

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When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

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Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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Text random people saying I'm pregnant

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.