When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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I meow when my cat meows.

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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Sometimes when I'm watching a sitcom, I get distracted from the jokes because the characters are in a bedroom and I start focusing on the awesome stuff they have.

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Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

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When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Comment on here and wait a few days and see if I got some likes . CMOOON , You do it .

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when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

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Boinked my neighbor

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Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

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Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.