watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

Pretend animals talk to you!

I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

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Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

Only one tissue left in the box... I'll just use toilet paper.

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

Wonder if life is just a dream then get a creepy feeling and immediately think happier thoughts.

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

Sometimes I walk around my house with my eyes closed and pretend I'm blind.

When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

Smell my fingers after I pick u pennies or unlock the door with my keys!

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

Look at my poop before flushing

moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.