It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

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Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

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Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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Comment on here and wait a few days and see if I got some likes . CMOOON , You do it .

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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Boinked my neighbor

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

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say "ow" when your character in a video game gets hurt

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

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Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

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I push the door open with my stomach

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

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Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

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think about how different my life would be I if I didn't get married

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.