After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

Get extremly pissed off when everyone on youtube thinks that only guys use the website and call you "dude" , "bro" or "sir" when they respond to a comment you posted -_-

Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

Videotape my mother in the shower.

Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

Boinked my neighbor

I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.