I think about other women when having sex

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

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Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

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When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

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CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

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When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.

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When the toilet paper falls to the floor, I quickly roll it again so nobody notices it.

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Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.