Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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my favorite singer is Bles Bridges 22/07/1947-24/03/2000

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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Feels my beard with my tongue.

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I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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humiliating little girls

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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blink

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Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

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Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

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I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.