I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.

Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

Take off the ends of the banana (

Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

Think that the person driving keeps staring at me when ever they look in the mirror and I'm sat in the back.

my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

Just think about this. I do. What if we are all a character from The Sims and there is someone controlling us as their character and we never really did anything by our own choice. Creepy.

When peeing at a urinal, move my stream back and forth the coat as much of the wall as I can.

While trying to sleep I obsess over the little red LED on the TV set which I can't even see unless I lift my head from the pillow.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.