After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

test how many stares you can scale in one step

Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.