After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

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Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

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See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

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Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.