Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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sometimes when i'm talking to myself and someone walks in the room i have to make them believe what i'm saying is a song!!

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my favorite singer is Bles Bridges 22/07/1947-24/03/2000

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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I feel that getting a 98 on a test is better than getting a 99.

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

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Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.