Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -55

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

thumb_up thumb_down -71

When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

thumb_up thumb_down -81

If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.

thumb_up thumb_down -89

Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

Take off the ends of the banana (

thumb_up thumb_down -103

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

thumb_up thumb_down -111

Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I always think I have special powers

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.