I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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I piss in the bed every night

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try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

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Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

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I never feel bored

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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LOG OFF OF ICHAT BECAUSE THE PERSON U WERE JUST TALKING TO WENT OFFLINE.

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I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.