Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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humiliating little girls

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I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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Look at my poo before I flush it.

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CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

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Rubbing the corners of your lips on the side of your hand and smelling it.

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If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

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I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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when you hear "tartar sauce" you think that it's actually made from tartar -MATT

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

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Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.