At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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humiliating little girls

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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Look at my poo before I flush it.

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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blink

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Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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I got 12 months free xbox live gold from this website http://freexboxlivegoldcodes.org .You can also get it.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

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Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

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I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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Take off the ends of the banana (

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.