I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

Eating chicken at KFC.

Look at my poo before I flush it.

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.