Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

I always feel as if someone is always watching me on a screen where ever I am, and every person in the world is also being watched as well

I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.