Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

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I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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Videotape my mother in the shower.

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Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

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When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.

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Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.