eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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I always feel as if someone is always watching me on a screen where ever I am, and every person in the world is also being watched as well

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Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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Freak out at sudden noises when home alone at night.

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i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

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Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

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Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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blink

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I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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Poo really loud

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.