getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

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Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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imagine a bunch of girls are watching you at home, so you don't look like a dumbass

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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Thinking about what is nothing and other deep shit when trying to fall asleep.

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Take off the ends of the banana (

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get under the covers and curl up into a ball to get warm really fast

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.