Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

use tweezers to pull out leg hair or armpit hair out of sheer boredom.

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.