Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

I speak dialogues at home to myself that I could possibly have with people in hypothetical situations. Km

I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

test how many stares you can scale in one step

See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

I Masturbate Daily.

getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.