Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

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When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

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Feels my beard with my tongue.

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Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

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if I see submissions above mine get thumbs up but not mine I will put them down

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whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

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rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

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If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

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Mayada stupid

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try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

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When I was younger I'd lay in bed & think about who I would pick if a person told me that I had to choose between 2 people and the 1 that I don't choose will die.

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.