Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -71

Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

thumb_up thumb_down -91

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

thumb_up thumb_down -91

Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

get under the covers and curl up into a ball to get warm really fast

thumb_up thumb_down +38

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

thumb_up thumb_down +26

looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

thumb_up thumb_down +20

realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

thumb_up thumb_down +18

touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

thumb_up thumb_down +12

When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

When you look at the sidewalk and try to step on the boxes instead of the lines, and feel like you need to do it a number of times per leg to make it even.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Mayada stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

thumb_up thumb_down

When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.