Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

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Try tosing in the same tone and impersonate a girl voice while listening to music in my room, but then quickly start humming in a low voice when someones walking by -Ethan

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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Listening to romantic hollywood sad core and feeling depressed because your single.

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Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

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When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

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I like making subliminal messages (givemeyourmoney)

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Eat the last bowl of ice cream. Then 6 hours later, you wish you hadn't. (sometimes even open the fridge and check whether you actually ate it or not)

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.