Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

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Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

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Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

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Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

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Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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I Masturbate Daily.

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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When eating chips I always look at each side before eating it to choose which side will taste better

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.