I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

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Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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When eating chips I always look at each side before eating it to choose which side will taste better

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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When i am home alone i think there are hidden cameras in my house and wave at objects that might conceal the camers to scare the people looking through them

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

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When I was younger I'd lay in bed & think about who I would pick if a person told me that I had to choose between 2 people and the 1 that I don't choose will die.

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

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Sleep in your jeans because you think it feels comfortable in the morning.

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when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

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Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.