realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

I piss in the bed every night

When i am home alone i think there are hidden cameras in my house and wave at objects that might conceal the camers to scare the people looking through them

Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

Tear up when I poop

sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.