If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

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strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

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my favorite singer is Bles Bridges 22/07/1947-24/03/2000

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

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sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.