After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When I see someone with similar hair to mine, I stare at them from behind and try to figure out if that's what I look like from the back.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Not eat French fries because I don't like the taste rather than because they are unhealthy?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

thumb_up thumb_down -32

You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Turn shower water all the way up hot before getting out because it feels good

thumb_up thumb_down -46

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

thumb_up thumb_down -64

eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

thumb_up thumb_down -80

Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

thumb_up thumb_down -92

I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.