If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.

When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

my favorite singer is Bles Bridges 22/07/1947-24/03/2000

Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.