I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

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looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

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I piss in the bed every night

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.