Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

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Videotape my mother in the shower.

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blink

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

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When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)

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When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

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Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.