DIY LOL
Anti Joke
I AM DISAPPOINT
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Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.
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-42
I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.
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-42
I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.
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-44
when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength
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-50
If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me
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-50
When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move
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-62
Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt
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-66
Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.
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-70
Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.
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-70
I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!
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-72
Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.
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-78
Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case
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-80
When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.
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-80
I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)
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-88
When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)
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-88
When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.
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-90
as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT
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-114
Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.
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+43
After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe
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+39
Become self-conscious and wonder if you were making faces while day dreaming during the middle of class.
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+37
Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"
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+25
Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <
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+23
Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it
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+7
it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill
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+7
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.