Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have a big twitch, freak out when you are dosing off in class but suddenly wake up.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Tear up when I poop

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

thumb_up thumb_down -16

after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Picking your dogs booger for him/her

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

thumb_up thumb_down -28

I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Freak out at sudden noises when home alone at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.