- Things You Think Only You Do

Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

I lift my butt when I'm farting

Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

that movie-like moment when you want to rush out to dance in the rain

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.