Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

thumb_up thumb_down -63

I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

thumb_up thumb_down -73

that time where you open the fridge door and stare at it for like 10 min then close it and walk away?

thumb_up thumb_down -75

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

thumb_up thumb_down -81

When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

thumb_up thumb_down -91

Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

thumb_up thumb_down -91

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

thumb_up thumb_down -113

Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

thumb_up thumb_down +36

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +28

When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I piss in the bed every night

thumb_up thumb_down +12

When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Do somthing only you do

thumb_up thumb_down -6

(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

thumb_up thumb_down -6

1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.