sometimes when i'm talking to myself and someone walks in the room i have to make them believe what i'm saying is a song!!

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Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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pee when you are dreaming haha lol

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I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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I wonder if elections are rigged?

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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I don't read the terms of service.

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Smoking in the shower.

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Turn shower water all the way up hot before getting out because it feels good

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Poo really loud

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.