Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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I like to watch lava lamps heat up

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When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

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Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

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looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

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When i am home alone i think there are hidden cameras in my house and wave at objects that might conceal the camers to scare the people looking through them

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When you look at the sidewalk and try to step on the boxes instead of the lines, and feel like you need to do it a number of times per leg to make it even.

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.