Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

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When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

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I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.

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When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.