Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

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think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

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Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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get annoyed when the pop-up lid on the dish soap bottle is left up

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Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

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When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

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When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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Tough but loving hands!! Mmm them calluses tho!! ^_^

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Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.