Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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Take off the ends of the banana (

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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Right after moving to a new place I check my room for hidden cameras.

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

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after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

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Listening to more obscure music in a public place and turning it up in hopes that someone will ask you what you're listening to and you can tell them about it/open their minds.

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when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

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Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

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Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

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You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

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The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.