Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

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If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

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When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

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When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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sometimes when i'm talking to myself and someone walks in the room i have to make them believe what i'm saying is a song!!

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Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

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When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

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When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

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When I am making toast I spread the butter or jam with a spoon

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Listening to romantic hollywood sad core and feeling depressed because your single.

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Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

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Feels my beard with my tongue.

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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I like making subliminal messages (givemeyourmoney)

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

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Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.