taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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I piss in the bed every night

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

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When i am home alone i think there are hidden cameras in my house and wave at objects that might conceal the camers to scare the people looking through them

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Doing something, and someone asks you what you're doing, and you realize you can't remember. Then they walk off and the instant they're gone, you remember.

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I hit the frig after sex

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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Listening to romantic hollywood sad core and feeling depressed because your single.

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

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Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.