You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

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While trying to sleep I obsess over the little red LED on the TV set which I can't even see unless I lift my head from the pillow.

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

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when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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Not eat French fries because I don't like the taste rather than because they are unhealthy?

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When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.