Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

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as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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Sometimes after a long, hard day or when something bad happens I just sit down and cry in the shower.

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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Tear up when I poop

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

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I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.