When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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Before posting a comment when you need several consecutive tries to type the words in the box because the lettering is so damn hard to read. But your friend can do it in one try. He got the easy one.

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

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think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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Doing something private and think "What if my mom/dad/boss etc. saw me now?"

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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When I take a shower, I screw with my iPod for a half an hour "Waiting for the water to warm up".

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.