Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

Right after moving to a new place I check my room for hidden cameras.

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.