If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.