When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

I like to watch lava lamps heat up

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

Go for a 10 mile run.

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

Mayada stupid

I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.