taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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Being so socially awkward that when you have a successful interaction with another human being, you play it in your head over and over again.

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I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

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While trying to sleep I obsess over the little red LED on the TV set which I can't even see unless I lift my head from the pillow.

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

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When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

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Think that when you're reading something or watching tv some people somewhere are knowing what your watching or whether or not you understand what you just read so you don't wanna reread it to risk looking stupid.

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

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A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.