- Things You Think Only You Do

Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

Rubbing the corners of your lips on the side of your hand and smelling it.

Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

Put my hands together the 'other' way

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.