(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Sometimes I toot.

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When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

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get annoyed when the pop-up lid on the dish soap bottle is left up

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Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

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I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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I always try to play it cool and act like it’s no big deal. But I always have a mini anxiety attack before actually stepping onto a moving escalator. It is a task trying to time my step perfectly where my foot isn’t hanging off a step and I have to hurry my second foot on there isn’t an awdward space of steps between my feet. -Ikka

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Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

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When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

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I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

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Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

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That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.