when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

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dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

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Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

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I piss in the bed every night

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When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

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Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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Sometimes after a long, hard day or when something bad happens I just sit down and cry in the shower.

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I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.