I piss in the bed every night

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Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

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Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

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Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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Sometimes after a long, hard day or when something bad happens I just sit down and cry in the shower.

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

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Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Tear up when I poop

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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I always go to sleep with every single one of my stuffed animals in my arms at the same time because I think that they get lonely and sad if I pick certain ones. Then again I sometimes wonder if they secretly hate me and think I'm a weird creep for hugging all of them every night. I'm 24.

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When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.