Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

I have memorized my drivers license registration number

Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

I like to watch lava lamps heat up

Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

I wonder if sport games are rigged?

When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

Save more than once on your favourite game.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.