- Things You Think Only You Do

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

I can't piss with my shoes on.

I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.