When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

Picking your dogs booger for him/her

After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

I cant ride a bike

Freak out at sudden noises when home alone at night.

Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

Videotape my mother in the shower.

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.