Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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I like making subliminal messages (givemeyourmoney)

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

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You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

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Listening to more obscure music in a public place and turning it up in hopes that someone will ask you what you're listening to and you can tell them about it/open their minds.

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I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

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Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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Videotape my mother in the shower.

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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.