Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

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Stab myself on a daily basis

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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Sometimes, for no real reason, I'll make strange or funny noises when no one is around.

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

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Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.