i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

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Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

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Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Freak out at sudden noises when home alone at night.

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I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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I got 12 months free xbox live gold from this website http://freexboxlivegoldcodes.org .You can also get it.

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.