Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

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Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

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Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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Only use the left earphone.

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

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Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.