see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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pretend your on the phone talking to someone to make you look like you not a loner

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

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Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

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Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

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Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

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Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.