While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Cough, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

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Tear up when I poop

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Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

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Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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Run the shower before you get in/ move out the way of the water to let it warm up first

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Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.