- Things You Think Only You Do

Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

I think of who will I save if a killer come to school

Zoning out while looking at something and then trying to find the spot you were looking at when you're out of the zone but you can't find it.

Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

Eating chicken at KFC.

test how many stares you can scale in one step

Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

After brushing my teeth I used to suck the water from it

Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.