Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

not be afraid of hurricane sandy

I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.