I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

make south park refferences every day

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

I was the real Stig...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.