Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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I play video games with the controller under the covers.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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Wonder what would happen if you started screaming and defecating in public.

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Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

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The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

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When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

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Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

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Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night

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Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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Think that when you're reading something or watching tv some people somewhere are knowing what your watching or whether or not you understand what you just read so you don't wanna reread it to risk looking stupid.

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make south park refferences every day

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.