Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

try to give your friends spirit animals

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

make south park refferences every day

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.