Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

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Anytime I walk in anyplace with cracks in the ground (tiled floors, cement squares, etc.) I do my best to avoid stepping on cracks in fear of something happening if I do.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

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turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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Put a few bits of toilet paper in the toilet before having a poo so there is no splash!

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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I like making subliminal messages (givemeyourmoney)

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Constantly looking up at a Facebook tab while on another tab to see if you have any notifications or messages.

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I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

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I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.