I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

Twice on two different internet super power sites, I posted sdrawkcab epyt ot REWEP eth"... ...Sadly I forgot to type MORAL under them, so they have... several thumbs ups... NERO: In a world of bithes and h0m0f*gs that never understood that my "MORALS" where pure SARCASM!... Oh, I also think I am one of the three hundred guys that gangbang your mother.

when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

I always try to play it cool and act like it’s no big deal. But I always have a mini anxiety attack before actually stepping onto a moving escalator. It is a task trying to time my step perfectly where my foot isn’t hanging off a step and I have to hurry my second foot on there isn’t an awdward space of steps between my feet. -Ikka

Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.