Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

if I see submissions above mine get thumbs up but not mine I will put them down

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

I was the real Stig...

When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.