When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

I gotta get down of Friday

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.