When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

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Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

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Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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I gotta get down of Friday

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click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

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Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

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Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

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Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.