- Things You Think Only You Do

only read the short jokes on this website

When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

Ur mum

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

Picking my nose.

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.