i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

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Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

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When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

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I hit the frig after sex

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When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

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always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.