Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

Think that when you're reading something or watching tv some people somewhere are knowing what your watching or whether or not you understand what you just read so you don't wanna reread it to risk looking stupid.

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

Put my hands together the 'other' way

Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

My brother (who is 2 years younger) and I have our own language, consisting of movie quotes and silly stuff we made up when we were little. We speak it with abandon when we're alone, and try as hard as we can to suppress it when we're with a friend. But sometimes some of it slips out, and the friend looks at us like he's the guy who isn't in on the joke; I always get the feeling he or she thinks the two of us are crazy. By the way, if you're the third person in company with two close siblings who are speaking their own secret language, don't ask them to explain or look at them like they're crazy. They're not nuts, and you won't understand, even if they try to explain. Just let it pass.

When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

I hit the frig after sex

I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.